A Note From Dad

A Note From Dad

It has been quite some time since I have posted to the blog as usually Kristi and I are making a post together or she has found time to write a few by herself (I have no idea how she finds the time, she is amazing that way).  Anyway, I really have been doing a ton of thinking here leading up to Isaac’s surgery on Tuesday and thought writing a blog post of all my random thoughts could be rather therapeutic.  It has been a long road to this point, and I really do believe that we are just now making a turn onto the highway.  And while going faster forward is good, there certainly seem to be more pitfalls to avoid. 

                  Kristi and I made the decision to go ahead with Isaac’s surgery for many different reasons, reasons I am not going to get into on a public blog, but suffice it to say, we had lengthy conversations on this topic, weighed the pros and cons, and ultimately decided this course of action was best for Isaac.  We know it will difficult for him, and I can only imagine the questions he will ultimately have about his condition, but I am confident we will be able to explain to him our rationale and that he will understand (even at this young age) that we are doing what all parties involved believe is the very best for him.

                  I worry about Isaac during surgery, I worry about Isaac after surgery and in the days and weeks he will be in recovery.  I worry about Eli missing his big brother, I worry about Eli and how he will react once Isaac is home.  I worry about my wife, who has done so much through all of this, I worry that she is pulling a heavier load than me, and I desperately want to shoulder more of the burden to help her out.  She needs that, but more importantly, she deserves that.  The number of times that she is able to remember things that need to be done for the boys (outside of their normal schedules) is truly astonishing.  I don’t know how she does it.  I really don’t.  Not only can she do all that, but she continues to plug away at work, sometimes working well into the night to try and get caught up so she can do something for our boys the next day.  I love her, she is inspiring. 

                  I worry about our families, who have been so good to us.  They continue to support us and we will never be able to repay them for this.  Tim, Laine, Roxy, John, Brett, Katie, and Duke have been absolutely awesome.  The number of times they have stepped in and allowed Kristi and I a break is off the charts.  Thank you.  My parents, Kevin and Debbie, who look after the boys whenever we need them too and who have spent countless hours having dinner with us we can never thank you enough.  The boys love the trains by the way!  To my brother and sister-in-law, Russ and Andrea, I am always amazed how you call at just the right time, or have something awesome to say just when we need it.  We sometimes don’t do a great job of keeping people updated, but you guys have always come through and we appreciate that so much.  We have to do better (meaning Kristi and I) of getting out to Manhattan cause we love hanging out at your place and letting the boys play.  To Lisa, you have absolutely terrific to us and we can’t ever say thank you enough.  You come over at a moment’s notice, and routinely spend time with the boys, especially when Kristi would have had to spend the night by herself due to me having soccer or basketball games.  Thank you.  To Dale and Sue and Cassie, you guys have never once waivered when we asked to drop them off so we could go to our church small group.  You have come to our when needed and it is always fun to have you around.  And even though there was a small issue, Colorado was absolutely a blast.  We had so much fun and it was so nice to get out and see you all there, we can’t thank you enough.  

                 To our extended family (and I will forget people here and I apologize) Lynne, Mike, Erica, Carrie, Paula, Monica, Kathy, Cathy J, and anyone else who has helped us through these first 3 years, thank you so much.  Our support network is unbelievable.  To our friends, Jennifer and Kenny, Casey and Abby, Marty and Meg, Cassie and Bryan, Hannah and Paul, Maureen, and anyone else who I am sure I am forgetting, thank you for being around when we either needed someone to talk to, or a fun night or day on the town.  We appreciate you all.  To our small group at church, you guys are invaluable, even though we don’t get there often enough.  We routinely think about you all, including those that aren’t with the group anymore.  Thank you all for helpful prayers, and for just asking, “how are you”?  We really do appreciate that so much.   Like I have said, I am sure I am leaving people out, and I don’t mean to.  

                But I want to finish by thanking our caretakers of Isaac and Eli.  Nicole, you are truly amazing and we are thankful for having you for this journey from the very beginning.  I know Isaac has given you fits, but he wouldn’t be where he is today without you.  To Jaci, you have always been so helpful in getting the equipment Isaac needs and for pushing him to do more.  Thank you for all your help.  To Sherri, thank you for helping with Isaac’s eating issues, we know we are quite done with this problem yet, but hopefully we continue to make progress.  To Amy, I am going to blame you (in a fun way!) for Isaac talking ALL THE TIME.  Thanks, I think!!!  J  To Dana, thanks for assuring us that Isaac can grow on his own curve, we continue to hope he can make strides and you routinely have had the answers that get him going again.  So, thank you so much for that.  And finally, thank you Jaime.  I would guess you didn’t sign up for all of these different complications that come up with Isaac and Elias.  But, you have done so much for them that it would be impossible to recount all the ways you have helped these boys.  We rely so heavily on you and you always come through.  Thank you so much.  We know these next couple of months will be taxing on everyone and we are thankful to have you to help us through them. 

               You know, Isaac and Eli are really amazing little guys.  They give each other hugs, they talk to one another all the time, and they are learning to play together (which is awesome to watch).  But more than that, sometimes I just take a step back and just smile (kinda to myself!) because these are our boys, MY boys, and they absolutely have a daddy who will go to the end of the earth for them.  I want them to have everything (within reason of course).  I want them to dream big, and I want them to always support one another.  I had someone at my school the other day tell me to not worry, the docs know what they are doing.  But I kindly responded it is my job to worry about my boys, and I don’t mind doing that.  No surgery is routine for a 2 ½ year old.  I don’t buy that, but I am confident in our medical team.  I want Isaac to get better, it is that simple.  Our definition of better is probably skewed a bit, but I do think this surgery will make him better.  I am so excited thinking about what the summer will look like in our household.   It is certainly true that Kristi and I have been getting a little more anxious as what we hoped would never have to happen will indeed occur.  However, maybe having this surgery and the subsequent one in February will be a blessing.  It will allow us to know that after it is done, this is our Isaac, and we can help him reach his full potential.  I am sure it will be a tough road, but I am looking forward to their 3^rd birthday and these next few months are hopefully just a speedbump until that party.